Saw Mandy last night

Last night i went out with my friend Mandy, after doing a Yoga class with Lawren. I'm so sore from it! :)


My friend Mandy and I get together every 2 months or so, and just catch up. Its always so nice, because she is one person i can be totally honest with. I never have to try to be someone else, or want to be someone else. Anywho, we got together last night and just talked and talked... it was really nice to just hang out. She's having Wedding Fever, and i admitted i'm having Baby Fever.... lol
I cant wait until she gets married! I told her the idea i have for her and Daniel's Engagement photos! lol, she loved it! YEY! I'm so excited! I'm hoping it comes up soon! I'm so excited!


Anywho. Totally wanting to get pregnant. And it's horrible, because i feel bad for wanting this! I know Drew isn't ready yet... And I think we should wait, just because I'm about to turn 24 and Drew's 23... We have alot of traveling to do!  So I've decided that i just need to push this feeling off for a while!
Who knows how long this is going to last! lol

Its been awhile...

Wow... It's been awhile since I've written in here!! I've had alot of thoughts lately, i guess i just didn't know how to wright them down...


A lot has been happening! My photography is getting bigger and better everyday! I'm getting so excited! I'm going to be working on building my Client-tell in California, but also Arkansas, because I visit so often! So wish me luck! lol


Chelsea's living down in California with Drew and I now!!!! It's so wonderful to have her here! I cant believe how long we went without living near each other before! lol. She now has a job at Starbucks and she's building her own little side business! Her yummy goodies that she bakes!!


I've started Yoga! And joined a Yoga Studio called YogaWorks! And I'm in loveeee! I'm actually going tonight! YEY!


I feel like i need to write more... hmm.... Oh yeah, I totally have Baby fever.... its awful, i feel like i need to STOP thinking i want a baby, and at the same time I'm telling myself "no! you are ready for a baby". But i look at my age, I'm only going to turn 24 in July! thats so young! I dont know, what do you think?


Anywho, I keep manifesting for my photography to build and grow everyday! I'm just so excited to be able to do my dream job on the side right now! <3 I'm just trying to get all my label's and such going! AH! I'm going to go to Office Depot this weekend, if i'm not able to go this week! I need to get things started!


So if you guys are interested in getting your picture taken, shoot me an email! or visit my website : kristenstokes.com


Okay, I'll try to update more often! I'll try to write tomorrow! :)

Crying

I feel like crying.

I dont know what it is.

Today, Carole, Jazmin, and Merrik came over and we watched the 3 Twilight movies. It was wonderful being around them. Drew was out of the house all day... and i feel like he REALLY doesn't like them. But, I'll have to talk to him about that later. Anyways, I'm now just sitting here, with my sleeping puppies right by my side. and I just have this sad feeling. Christmas is almost here...

I have so many gifts to still get! I cant believe it! I'm so excited... but I'm not at the same time! I hate when i get into this funk... now that i realize it, this is why i like to be on the move, doing something everyday! I like to feel sad. I used to HATE being alone.... but now, i dont mind as much... its just the 'yuck' feeling.

Anyways, i think I'll head to bed! I have work tomorrow! Drew isn't home yet... but... i dont care, im tired. lol

Alright, I'll try to write later!

Thoughts and Feelings

Hello.

I've been having so many thoughts.

Oh, and feelings. crying?... why do i cry?

But I also laugh. and smile.

So, here are my thoughts&feelings : love. anger. hope. sad. happy. fear. dread. disappointment.

And, i know this is normal. Everyone feels this way... but i need to get out my emotions on paper (aka. the internet). I'm having my own issues with friends. And, last night i got together with one of my friends, Vanessa, and i was telling her how i was feeling. I'm feeling like i care more about my friendship's than my friends do... And, she told me she went through this last year, with herself. What she was saying, thats how I'm feeling... like you have to get in contact with everyone, and try try try.... and I was telling Vanessa, how i HAVE to TRY not to text or call someone... just to see if they will think of me and get a hold of me. I just dont like doing this... and trying to be someone im not. I know that EVERYONE is different and has there own lives, but just a "hey, how are ya", is great with me. Maybe I'm different and like to keep in touch with friends... and maybe I need new friends. But, I've just been feeling, like a crazy women... lol, because i read this and feel like such a baby! But, actually, I dont care! I needed to get this out.

So, I know who my friends are... So, i know some of them are selfish... And, i know they dont think to make the first call. But, I'm just thinking, i need to find new people to bring into my life, that have the same interests as me. On a side note, last night I told drew "I need a Photographer friend... and you need a computer friend!"... And It's true, and I think I'm going to start manifesting for that to come into my life. I need to get more contacts, so I can learn the way!

So, anyways... I've been taking pictures! This past weekend I had a Family session! It's was good! I have to finish editing the photos, and I'll upload them to my Blog! I need to get on my Photography blog! I'm so behind!

Oh! I forgot to talk about this AMAZING opportunity! To tell you the truth, i was so excited at first... and then got un-excited!... So, Drew and my friends, Mike and Krysten are going to New York in April of next year! And they invited Drew and I, & Robert and Lawren to come along! I was so excited!!!! And, Drew was willing to go which made the situation so much MORE exciting! Well, last week we had a 'Girls Night' over at Lawren's, and it was DRAMA... ew.... and we ended up talking about New York. So, Lawren say's "I would like to go, but, i wouldn't want to hang out the whole time... I just want it to be me and Robert"... Which is fine and dandy with me! lol... But it got my thinking!.... I would love to do that, just Drew and I, going to all the places i want to see in New York! So anyways, Drew and I were talking about it last night, and i told him i wanted it to be just me and him.... and me saying it out loud, i wanted to laugh at myself!!!!! I've been wanting a trip to New York for as long as i can remember! And, here it is, and i said to myself TAKE IT! why not, right?!?!?! I really want to go, and I'm willing to go, right now! So going in 5 months with someone who has been (Mike)! What more could i ask for?! So all in all... I'm down!

Oh + Oh! Sister moving out here! AHHHHHHH.... I need to figure out when! lol... Drew and I need to find a Apartment! And i also need to figure out with Josh and Justin can come out with me to help chelsea and I drive cross country! So, Chelsea and I NEED to talk, we are both just so busy! BLAH! lol But, honestly, i cant wait to see her! And have her here! It just breaks my heart Mama will be alone out in Arkansas! :(

So... thats all for today folks!

Mmmm.... turkey, pie, mashed potatoes!

So Thanksgiving is ALREADY here!!!! i cant believe how fast this year has gone by! But I'm excited for the year to come though!

This year for Thanksgiving Drew and I are going to my Grandma Chiz's and then to my Grandpa Bumps and Judy's! So much food is going to be in our bellies! lol But I'm excited to see my cousin's! And this is our first Thanksgiving as a married couple! I'm so excited! lol... PLUS this is my favorite holiday!

Well, life as of today...

I'm in the works of building my Photography Website & Portfolio! Looking for a new Apartment! Getting ready for my sister to move out here! Looking for Christmas Gifts, which is really difficult this year, for some reason?! Manifesting every night for better and better things to come my way! And still learning who i am, and who I'm becoming.

The Married life, we are peachy! Still learning a lot about each other, even after 6 years of dating and 3 months of marriage, relationships are work! We keep building your relationship... and we keep walking up every step life gives us! So we are doing good! Life has slowed down since summer, and i love and hate it at the same time! I love the lazy days after work, just hanging out with Drew and Babies. But I also love going out with friends and family and just being on the go go go! I seem to be so indecisive! I want to be at home, and when I'm at home, I want to be out. I feel like I need to just figure out what i really want! It's just so difficult... So I'm trying to figure out what i want, and how to talk... because that is my weakness! I want to be able to say what i mean, and know what i want! So, from here on out... I'm going to try VERY hard to do what i want, and say what i think. I dont want to get hurt feelings anymore... or be tongue tied.

Sorry, I got off on a little tangent.

I REALLY miss my sister and Ashley...

Ideas

Photography...

Thinking...

Making a website...

Marriage...

Moving...

Seeing friends...

Missing family...

Needing money...

Babies Babies Babies

It's been a baby weekend! One of my bestfriends just had her Baby Boy, Merrik (I'll be updating my Photography Blog with pictures of Jasmin and Merrik this week)!! And one of my Oldest friends Chrystal, just had her baby boy Liam last month, but had a welcoming Liam to the world party yesterday! Liam is adorable! I'm so happy for both of my friends!!! They are both blessed with beautiful baby boys!

Today, I'm going to visit little Merrik! He's now home, and i cant wait to see that little face again! I got him a few outfits!!! I cant wait to show Jaz!

Oh my goodness, babies... i cant stop but think about when i get to have kids! I know its going to be ALOT of work! But i cant wait! I mean i can wait... i have to AT LEAST go to New York before i have a kid! I want to enjoy a few more years, being with Drew... doing things we wouldn't be able to do, if we have kids.

I think I'll make a list for myself!

Things to do before children:

- Visit New York

- Road Trip up to Canada

- Photography be my main income

- Live in something bigger than a 1 bedroom apartment

Maybe its good I cant think of anything else! lol...

I miss my mom and sister! I'll be out there in 9 days! And, i cant wait!

Also, having dinner with Carole tonight, which is ALWAYS a good time! And of course, going to see Merrik after! :D

So, I guess I'll talk to drew about my little bit of Baby Fever. lol... honestly, i think Drew doesn't want to hear it... lol... which is good! lol... I'm not ready, its just a nice thought.